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[May. 11th, 2008|01:41 pm] |
I feel a lot better than yesterday. I did some stretches yesterday, took an anti-inflamatory pill (the same one my gynocologist gave me for my menstrual cramps), and my back feels about 75% better. I went to spin class even though everyone else thought it was a bad idea. I know when I shouldn't do something, and if it had felt wrong I would have gotten off the bike and gone home. That was my plan. I just can't let myself become inactive or my back is going to get worse. That's what happened last time. People told me not to move...not knowing that it was causing me more pain and making me more stiff. I just hope I can start running again soon.
All in all I'm in a better mood today than I've been this past week. My period is over, I stepped on the scale and it went down for the first time in weeks, I'm actually studying, this whole school thing will be over soon, and most importantly I am celebrating my two year anniversary with my girl on the 14th. I just need to stay positive....at least for this week. |
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[May. 10th, 2008|05:23 pm] |
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This whole back problem? It's really gotta go. I don't have time for this. |
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[May. 9th, 2008|07:55 pm] |
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I think I'm having anger management problems. I need to consider going to see someone. |
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[May. 4th, 2008|10:09 am] |
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I am so angry at myself. I didn't go running yesterday. I fell asleep after dinner. And I didn't go to spin class this morning. I don't know what to blame. The fact that I got my period, or the really bad sunburn, or the fact that 5 minutes before I was supposed to leave with Christa she disappeared with Paulie. I'm so tired of this shit. I went running/walking/jogging for half an hour this morning and couldn't do half as much as I did a few days ago. I think I'm just tired. Today I'm going to try to not worry about it and concentrate on doing better tomorrow. |
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[Apr. 30th, 2008|10:31 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  anxious | ] |
Friday can't come soon enough. My only class was cancelled and it is officially a day of rest with my girlfriend. No class, no homework, no baskets, no gym, no spin class, no running, no nothing. Me and her in the horizontal position watching bad television and eating greasy pizza. Sounds pretty awesome. |
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[Apr. 29th, 2008|08:58 am] |
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1.25 miles. That's how far I ran yesterday without stopping. It's not 3 miles but it's more than I've ever been able to do at once. I'm shoting for 1.50 miles by the end of the week. |
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[Apr. 27th, 2008|01:29 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  hungry | ] |
I really hope this is PMS. I am so hungry today. I've been hungry all week. I even increased my calorie range from 1200-1550 to 1400-1750 and I'm still hungry. It might be in my head. Maybe I'm not eating the right foods to keep me full. I don't know, but I have to fix it because I hate being hungry. |
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[Apr. 25th, 2008|07:54 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  rejuvenated | ] |
I got my body fat percentage calculated at the gym today. I've been a little nervous to. Well, the guy made me hold this machine thing and some numbers came up. My body fat is 18.3% (allegedly) and he gave me a high five. According to him that is more than awesome. Women on average have about 20-23% body fat. I had no idea. It made me feel a little better considering I ate a little too much at Taco Bell today.
In other news, I have a cuddle date with my girl tonight and I can't even begin to express how much I need it...how much we need it. |
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[Apr. 25th, 2008|05:24 pm] |
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It's really frustrating when people don't stop doing certain things ever after you have asked them numerous times not to. It's happened twice today. It makes things so difficult for me. |
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[Apr. 25th, 2008|11:21 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | content | ] |
I just got off the phone with Nicole about my summer work schedule. Monday through Friday 10-5 (or later). If I save my money well I will have a $5,000+ increase in my savings. That's not even counting extra hours that I will be working when it's hell week and we need to ship those 500+ baskets for the All Star account. I don't like how much money I've spend since Christmas. I need to be more responsible.
And at least I have weekends and nights to myself. One thing I hated about Modell's was the night shift. I rather get everything done during the day and have the rest of the night to do what I want. |
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[Apr. 25th, 2008|10:50 am] |
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I'm eating Taco Bell today for lunch. I need a treat. And I am so excited. I ran/jogged/walked for over an hour at the track yesterday so a treat isn't going to kill me. Cheesy gordita crunch here I come. |
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[Apr. 24th, 2008|01:03 am] |
It looks like I have someone to run with now. If we are consistent we might decide to do a 5k marathon sometime this summer or maybe in the fall. The only problem is that I have very little endurance...which is twice as much as I had two months ago. We are both on the same level at this point, but he has a more physical job than I do so I need to work twice as hard. I've been doing cardio for a while and he was still able to keep up with me.
Christa is not being consistent, and I need someone who is going to go with me when they say they are going to go. I can't jump for her if she is going to flake on me every other day. I need someone to workout with. It makes it more bearable and it makes things a little competitive.
Anyway, on a more serious note I really need to do something about this other issue or I'm going to wake up one day and realize everything is gone. I need more hours in the day. |
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[Apr. 22nd, 2008|10:53 pm] |
I felt really strong at spin class today. It was challenging but I've noticed that I've been pushing myself harder without it feeling as though I'm on the brink of death. I really need to start a weight training regimen. It's been pretty sporadic and that's never good. I would pay for a couple of personal training session but I've spent enough money for this whole gym thing. I have to suck it up and plan out my own schedule and stick to it. Tomorrow = treadmill for half an hour at least. Screw the elliptical.
I feel like I'm detoxing from a lot of things in my life. Out with the bad. In with the good. No smoking. I'm not drinking...aside from a glass of wine with dinner here and there which can actually be good for you. I eat at least five servings of fresh fruit and vegetables a day and drink at least eight cups of water. And most importantly I've pretty much cut off most people in my life whom really had no positive impact on me. What I really need to do now is work on my anger issues. I don't know what has made me so angry at the world lately. I need to confront it on my own terms and figure out what is wrong. I'm doing this for me. And it's a long and lonely journey. |
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[Apr. 21st, 2008|10:11 pm] |
I'm starting to hate the elliptical. It doesn't challenge me anymore. I couldn't spend more than half an hour on it today. And it wasn't because I was tired. It was because my heart rate won't get up there and I'm not sweating half as much as I used to. I really need to use the treadmill more or everything I've done these past two months is going to be completely pointless.
I had a very interesting conversation with someone today. It really got me thinking. In ten years I could end up in the same situation and find myself regretting a lot of the same things. I wish I could wake up tomorrow with a clean slate and start all over again knowing what I know now. But that doesn't happen. We have to make our own decisions and deal with the consequences. |
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[Apr. 21st, 2008|10:01 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | worried | ] |
So I went a little too far last night. It was a lot of built up negative energy that needed to be expelled. It was selfish and cold. But it did ultimately make me feel better, and I'm sorry to say that I don't regret it.
I would make a terrible world leader. I seriously think that the moment I ever decided I didn't like something I would probably tear down entire cities with explosives and start fresh. Talk about bad PR.
Anyways. Nicole is going for surgery right before Savannah's Christening and this concerns me. And by right before I mean four days before. If the Christening were not the size of a wedding (still not exactly sure why it's so big) I think they probably would have postponed it....it just worries me. It's her gall bladder and could be much worse. And aside from the Christening....if there are any complications and she is held in the hospital I don't know who is going to help me run the store. Finals are coming up and I can't work everyday....and God knows Aurora isn't going to want to do shit. And we just got that account with Allstar Baseball. I'm just worried. |
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[Apr. 20th, 2008|12:25 am] |
The pope very nearly ruined my entire weekend. I think he was following us because every street we tried to go down magically closed off from one moment to the next. And the Jesus freaks running around with their Pope T-shirts, pins, and flags....priceless. I was too afraid to hold my girlfriend's hand...I pictured Bibles being chucked at our heads and boiling holy water scalding our skin.
But besides that my weekend was wonderful. We spent the majority of the past two sunny days chilling at Central Park, we went to the zoo (and the petting zoo naturally), and we even had a Sushi picnic. The weather was just awesome. And the company was even better. Good times.
Spin class in the morning...gotta sleep. |
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[Apr. 17th, 2008|10:02 pm] |
Anger anger anger. Relax. No worries. Relax. Shower. Go to bed. And relax.
I'm crazy.
I actually had a really good day. And I ran farther and faster on the treadmill than I have ever run in my life. It was an accomplishment. So I don't know what I'm getting all bent out of shape about. |
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| New toy. |
[Apr. 16th, 2008|12:14 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  excited | ] |
Holy shit. My new iPod nano is awesome and all the music on it is awesome(at least I think so). I can't wait to use it on the elliptical tomorrow. |
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[Apr. 13th, 2008|09:24 pm] |
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I had a really great weekend. Tyra Banks was fierce. No free stuff, though. Not fierce. Then MA and I drove for hours in NYC rush hour traffic to Troy to visit Liz at school. Zanna Don't was really entertaining. The drinks were not quite as strong as the rumors claimed they were. And I didn't get quite as drunk after the first one as people told me I would. But I slept well (aside from the couple fucking in the next room and the fact that MA and I were not). Breakfast was great. The ride back was lovely. Good times. Thanks Liz! |
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what_y0u_will's journal
tired